AN EARLY CHRISTMAS GIFT by SUSAN CROSBY

Author:SUSAN CROSBY, [CROSBY,, SUSAN]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: ROMANCE
Publisher: HARLEQUIN
Published: 2013-11-02T04:00:00+00:00

Chapter Eleven

Anxious, Jenny waited for him to respond, getting more nervous by the second.

“I want to wait until your first trimester is over,” Win said finally.

“Wait for what?”

“To make love.”

She couldn’t possibly have heard him correctly. “That’s six weeks away.”

“I know.”

“Why?”

“Because it’s sensible. And reasonable. Considering.”

She was utterly confused. “Considering what?”

“The possibility of you having another miscarriage.” He said it in a rush, as if he was ripping off the bandage, like they’d done with her parents.

Relief struck her first. “But you want me?”

His eyebrows drew together. “Of course I want you. Why would that change?”

“I was afraid...” She shook her head. She should’ve thought it through instead of reacting emotionally. She should’ve figured it out on her own. Could she have pregnancy brain, as Annie called it, this early?

“Do you remember what happened last time?” he asked, his gaze direct. “It was right after we’d had sex—a particularly enthusiastic experience, as you’ll recall, because we’d been married for a few days and were enjoying the freedom that came with that. You even said so yourself—that it was different, being married. We both went a little wild.”

“I remember.”

“So we had that great night, then you miscarried right after. Right after. I don’t want to take that chance.”

“I wish you’d talked to me about this.” Tenderness enveloped her. She reached for his hands. “I spoke with my doctor about it. She said just because it happened before didn’t mean it would happen again. She emphasized it was as safe now as before, that it’s unpredictable. If it’s going to happen, it’ll happen, whether or not we have sex.”

He pulled his hands free. “When did you talk to her?”

“Last week.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I don’t know. I just wanted to be sure of what we should and shouldn’t do, so I asked.” She hadn’t wanted to grieve again, not if she could help it. According to the doctor she shouldn’t do anything differently, not unless miscarriages became commonplace for her.

“You could have included me in the visit.” He looked and sounded hurt—and was entitled to it all.

“You’re right. I’m sorry.” This whole being-a-couple thing was hard to get used to. She’d been independent for so long. Sharing everything wasn’t coming naturally.

He’s your husband. He gets to know this stuff.

I know. I know.

His expression slowly shut down to a blank indifference, then he looked away. “If you don’t trust me enough to talk to me about these kinds of things, I don’t know what we’re doing here, Jen. I want to wait. Everything inside me says we should. You don’t agree, I know, but for me the temptation to give in to my physical need is too great if I sleep next to you. I have to think about it. Maybe I should use the guest room for now.”

He walked out of the house. When he hadn’t returned after fifteen minutes, she decided to wait for him in their bedroom.

The double bed felt huge without him, and cold, even in the middle of summer.

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